I can’t quit Van Halen

Last night, the Grammys has their nomination special. I never ever watch this type of show anymore. However, earlier this month, the Grammys tweeted the following:

“Who do u predict the reuniting band will be @ #GRAMMYnoms? Does this hint make u wanna ‘Jump’ & ‘Dance the Night Away’?”

Using those titles as a hint is like using peanut butter and jelly as a hint to what sandwich will be appearing on my plate.

So we , the Van Halen faithful, go into full on hysterics. Van Halen is going to appear on the Grammy Nomination show. Will they perform? Will it be a new song? Will Dave make an ass of himself? Many VH fans made plans go do something they would never do, and that was sit through an hour of horrible non van halen music to see just a glimpse of the band.

By the end of the hour, we realized once again we had been lied to. And the bitter taste of disappointment filled our mouths. Van Halen was a no show. There was not even a band reunion.

I can only guess what happened. Someone at the Grammy HQ may have been an over zealous VH fan and tweeted a bit prematurely. Or Van Halen was never supposed to be there in the first place. However, being a VH fan lately means you immediately assume that he band hates you. Because that is how they have acted toward their fans for the past 15 years.

The Van Halen camp refuses to give it’s fan base any information. They refuse to engage with their fan base. This leads to VH fans getting excited when a cryptic tweet is released. We go into full on fan boy mode. We tell everyone. We return to our VH playlists. We are ready to forgive and rock.

We suffer from battered wife syndrome. We get beat down, treated like shit, but we make excuses and always go back to the band. They continue to make promises, that end up being lies, and we defend them. After all, it’s our fault for likening them so much.

Since 1996, VH has done the following:

– Fired Sammy Hagar ( this was the beginning of the dark ages for VH fans)
– Teased a reunion with David Lee Roth, recording two songs and appearing on MTV
only to tell him to piss off after they remembered he was an asshole
– released an album with Gary Cherone which was about as close to a direct face punch
as they could.(1998)
– 2000-2003 they essentially fell off the grid. No news.
– 2004 they reunite with Sammy Hagar for a tour and three new songs. Ultimately the tour ended with everyone going their separate ways.
– 2007 they announced a tour with David Lee Roth, and fired long time bassist and founding member Michael Antony. They replaced him with Eddie Van Halen’s 15 year old son.
-2008 to the Present: another information blackout. Rumors have peppered the Internet of a new album. Nothing is made official. No statements from the band. And now the Grammy debacle.

After all this, I can tell you that when the next rumor crops up, VH fans like myself will be jumping up and down, quite ready to dance the night away.

I can’t explain it. I can’t quit Van Halen.

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